Your roadmap for a page-turning scene

Hi Reader,

Happy October! I hope you’ve been enjoying your fall so far. If you were with me for my last newsletter, remember we were talking all about how to write compelling scenes. I gave the key ingredients of any well-written scene (setting, motivation, conflict/tension, action, change/meaning, and the secret sauce of building each scene upon the next). If you didn’t get a chance to read it, you can read it here. ​

As promised, today I’ll be continuing that conversation.

If you’re a baker or a chef—or if you’ve ever followed a recipe before—then you know that a list of ingredients isn’t going to suddenly bake you a cake, right? It’s all about how you assemble those ingredients. That’s the part I’m aiming to demystify for you.

So you know what your character wants and you know what they’ll face as they try to accomplish their goal…but how do you turn that into an actual scene that people can’t look away from, that makes them want to keep turning pages? That's where the helpful structure of Story Grid comes in handy.

If you're unfamiliar with Story Grid, it’s a story and editing method developed by Shawn Coyne. It is vast and comprehensive and a little complex if you don’t like to geek out on story structure like I do, but I find that its fundamental pillar of “The 5 Commandments of Story + Objects of Desire” super, super simple and helpful when trying to understand how to craft a scene (or any unit of story).

​Before I explain their theory and apply it to the scene from You’ve Got Mail (32:40-38:00) from the previous week, I do want to mention that I am not an expert in their methodology, nor have I been formally trained. I’m just, like you, an eager beaver, excited to lap up and apply as much learning as I can to the world of writing, and to share it with other writers.

Okay, so let’s jump in.

Story Grid’s 5 Commandments of Story and Objects of Desire

Objects of Desire:

This is what your character specifically wants in your scene. It’s their goal, or what’s motivating them. As I mentioned previously, unless you have a character with a goal—or an object of desire—as Story Grid calls it, you will not have a good scene. The object of desire should be S.M.A.R.T.: Specific, measurable, attainable, relevant, and time-bound. Having an object of desire—scene-level and story-level—will drive your character’s actions and decisions, and add emotional depth to the story. This object of desire should also be tied to their desires, fears, hopes, and dreams. In other words, it’s directly related to their deeper motivation (belonging, love, achievement, safety, etc.). A good way of thinking about this is that the object of desire is the THING they believe will help them achieve their big internal story goal.

So, before you sit down to write your scene, you must understand what they want to accomplish in this scene.

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5 Commandments of Story

Think of these as your scene's major beats, if you will. This is how the action, the tension/conflict, and the change/meaning play out right before our eyes. Remember last week how I said that a scene is like a little story? It has a beginning, middle, and end, and something happens that shifts the character? This is the how it will all unfold.

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1. Inciting Incident: An event that disrupts the status quo and challenges your character’s object of desire.

So, your character comes into this scene with a desire or something motivating them. After making this object of desire clear to the reader, you then throw an wrench in their plan.

For Joe Fox (Tom Hanks) in the dinner party scene of You’ve Got Mail, we know that he wants to protect his business and remain anonymous to Kathleen Kelly. (Remember, a few scenes prior we saw him wander into her bookstore, The Shop Around the Corner with Annabel and Matt and adamantly try to avoid revealing his true identity to her. In the dinner scene, his initial desire is to avoid conflict. He’d much rather go about his business without making waves.

So what is the inciting incident that disrupts his status quo? Seeing Kathleen Kelly at the very same book industry party he’s attending with his girlfriend.

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2. Turning Point Progressive Complication: Events that introduce a complication for the character, standing in the way of their object of desire.

So, after you’ve established your character’s desire, then you’ve set up the inciting incident that will disrupt their merry little plan, and you’ve had them maybe pivot or react to the inciting incident, your next order of business is to introduce another event that complicates things for them further. Think of it as placing obstacles in the way of your character getting what he or she wants.

What does this look like for Joe Fox? He spots Kathleen then kind of ducks out of view. BUT THEN, when he goes to the bar to get a drink, whom should he come face-to-face with, but the very person he is trying to avoid. The very person that might make it hard for him to keep his cool and go about his own business-building without feeling like crap for threatening the livelihood of indie booksellers.

So what does he do? He politely says hello then moves on.

But then another Turning Point Progressive Complication arises (and yes, there can—should!—be multiple in a great scene): Someone reveals to Kathleen Joe Fox’s identity.

Then what? Yes, you guessed it, another Turning Point Progressive Complication: she confronts him.

“Fox, your last name is Fox”
“F-O-X,” Joe replies as he scoops food onto his plate.

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3. Crisis: A dilemma in which the character must choose between two competing options, forcing them to face their desires and fears

Think of this beat as mostly an internal one. The character has come crashing up against something they absolutely did not want to happen, and now they must make a choice.

In movies, like You’ve Got Mail the crisis is a little more implied, but since we are writing novels, which require interiority that lets us know exactly what the protagonist is feeling and why, and which shows them making decisions, we must make this its own beat. They are weighing decisions, choosing their next move based on the options in front of him.

Joe Fox’s options, as Kathleen engages and starts insulting him and his business is to either continue ignoring her or step into the ring and defend himself and his business. His key object of desire in the movie is lifting the new Fox Book Superstore off the ground and seeing it succeed. He’s proud of his work, and it matters deeply to him. In this moment, he can either lay down and take her insults, or get in the ring and fight.

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4. Climax: The character’s decision and action in response to the crisis. Peak of the scene’s tension and shows their commitment to their object of desire.

So once the character has deliberated over their next steps, this is the reaction beat. And if you’re doing it right, this is when your two characters with opposing objects of desire are in a deadlock. The biggest thing you want to remember here is that your character must act.

How much does their scene object of desire matter to them in this moment? Are they willing to circumvent rules or characters or morals, or values to get it? Are they going to show their flaws or claws in this moment?

Joe Fox certainly does. When Kathleen accuses him of spying, he winds up engaging and defending himself and his store. What’s worse is that he does it in a way that he’s not proud of. He hurts her feelings, basically calls her and her store inconsequential. This is the peak of the scene’s tension, when she’s obviously so offended by his words that she can’t speak.

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5. Resolution: Shows the outcome of the climax and a shift from the beginning of the scene; ties back to their object of desire.

How does the scene end? What has changed since the beginning of the scene? Did your character win their object of desire? Did they learn something? Lose something? Gain something? Did something shift in their knowledge, circumstances, worldview, or relationships?

Think of this as another internal beat. The character must process what happed and make meaning of it. And then they must think about their next steps. What will they do to win their object of desire in the next scene if they failed, or what will they do with it if they succeeded? Show us the point of the scene and build momentum toward the next one.

The resolution of the scene between Joe Fox and Kathleen Kelly results in cementing them as rivals. They do not like each other, and they are completely at odds in their book industry philosophies. And yet they are each committed to their objects of desires: Their bookstore careers.

But…in the very next scene, we see Joe Fox regretting how he behaved toward Kathleen. He laments the way his claws came out, which propels the next piece of their written relationship forward. None of that would happen without the dinner party scene which absolutely shifted their dynamic.

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So I hope you can see how to lay out your scenes better now. You’re opening with them trying to achieve a goal, then something—or things—thwart them. Then they must internally weigh their options (which should both/all be bad), before taking action and struggling to overcome their obstacles. At the end, they process what happened and find that something has changed.

Make sense?

I hope this helps you map out your scenes successfully moving forward! Please feel free to reach out with any questions. I’d love to hear about the scenes your loving or struggling with to see if I can help.

Offerings

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Thanks so much for being here with me. I value you and I sincerely hope that I provide value for your writing journey. If you feel inclined, drop me a line and let me know what you’re working on!

Happy Writing,

Karyn

P.S. Loving these emails? Buy me a cup of tea to say thanks. Or you can book a free 30-min story strategy chat here if you're interested in getting specific help with your book.

Granite Bay, CA
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